I learned at a very young age that, when it came to my father's attention, I would be ignored if I didn't do things he was interested in and would only get attention if I did things he found interesting.
He's into sports. I'm not. When I was little, I was pretty much forced into softball against my will. I did horribly, at least in part because I absolutely did not want to be there. I went to path of just doing what I wanted as best as I could and often being dragged off to do things I found boring because he wanted me to do them with him arguing that I really should be interested in football and fishing and whatever and me trying to read during the game or look for neat rocks while fishing.
Out of all us kids (seven in total), my father knows me the least because we never really connected. Everyone else played sports and went fishing and I just either didn't or certain didn't participate with any enthusiasm. I was into reading, writing, and art. My dad rarely if ever tried to get involved in any of that. Oddly enough the only little bit of overlap-music-didn't work out either. I asked for a guitar and then, when I got it for my birthday, asked him to teach me. But he said he learned by himself so I should too. That got nowhere and I never learned how to play.
I try really hard to get into and support Finn who is into sports. He does swim and wrestling and soccer (thankfully at different times of the year). He's really into those sports and I cheer him on and back him up on those because I know how shitty it is for a parent to ignore you when you're doing things you like but they don't. In fact, I don't think Finn even realizes I find those things boring.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2017-06-05 03:20 pm (UTC)He's into sports. I'm not. When I was little, I was pretty much forced into softball against my will. I did horribly, at least in part because I absolutely did not want to be there. I went to path of just doing what I wanted as best as I could and often being dragged off to do things I found boring because he wanted me to do them with him arguing that I really should be interested in football and fishing and whatever and me trying to read during the game or look for neat rocks while fishing.
Out of all us kids (seven in total), my father knows me the least because we never really connected. Everyone else played sports and went fishing and I just either didn't or certain didn't participate with any enthusiasm. I was into reading, writing, and art. My dad rarely if ever tried to get involved in any of that. Oddly enough the only little bit of overlap-music-didn't work out either. I asked for a guitar and then, when I got it for my birthday, asked him to teach me. But he said he learned by himself so I should too. That got nowhere and I never learned how to play.
I try really hard to get into and support Finn who is into sports. He does swim and wrestling and soccer (thankfully at different times of the year). He's really into those sports and I cheer him on and back him up on those because I know how shitty it is for a parent to ignore you when you're doing things you like but they don't. In fact, I don't think Finn even realizes I find those things boring.